My new job

I got a new calling (job) at church today. Wanna guess what it is?

Here's a hint-

I'm the mother of three boys.

I've actually been expecting this job for 4 1/2 years now.

Since Nick was 8. (that's another hint)

You guessed it! I'm a Cub Scout den leader!- Assistant Webelos Den Leader to be exact.

The only real surprise was that I am actually in between cub scouts of my own now. Zach still has a year. Well at least I will most likely be asked to work with cub scouts several times. (Or so the story goes)

I think it will be fun. I'm just the assistant, which I am always happy about, and I hear that the Webelos are the best group to get.

Meet the Family

Daddy-Sissy and/or Momma- (Mostly Sissy though)
SissyNannyNannyIniter(If you haven't guessed already, these are our names according to Initer.)

Dear Heidi, Ali, and Kirsten-

I'd like to thank the three of you for wasting my entire day today. I spent 5 straight hours on my couch, and I have you guys to blame for it. I accomplished absolutely nothing today, and I can look forward to many more hours doing the exact same thing.

After listening to the three of you babble on about how great the show The Office was, I decided to give it a shot, and since I recently signed up for Netflix and can download whole seasons of many TV shows to my TV, I decided I had nothing to lose, except maybe a half hour or so of my time. I'm halfway through season 2.

Heidi and Ali- you two have been making me laugh since junior high. And Kirsten, we've only known each other for a few years, but we have a lot more in common than just our names. Some days I've wondered if we were seperated at birth (except we don't look alike and you put spinach in brownies- blech). But anyways, because I like you all so much and think you guys have a great sense of humor, I've given the show a few chances before, you know, when there was nothing else on TV to watch, but just catching random episodes here and there have left me utterly confused as to how anyone could find this show remotely funny. Frankly, I thought it was really stupid. Worse, it was boring.

Watching it from the beginning was the thing to do. It took a few episodes to get hooked, but now I totally am. Today I laughed so hard I cried. I still don't think the "That's what she said" line is funny, maybe it will grow on me. But the whole bit where Jim put Dwight's office supplies in the candy machine had me in tears. And speaking of Jim, I really hope Pam dumps what's-his-face, her loser fiance, soon and realizes that she and Jim were meant to be together.

So, uh, thanks again, but I gotta go. Now that the kids are home and have kicked me off the TV, I need to do things that I've been neglecting all day- clean up the breakfast dishes, change a diaper, figure out what to do for dinner since I didn't go to the store like I was going to.

hugs and kisses, Kirsten.

Death of a Garbage Can

Ode to a garbage can-

While weekly you fulfilled your job of containing all the refuse my family threw out, still I will not miss your stinky vileness. I recognize your contribution to our household, but I am still not saddened by your loss. It is with only the regret that now I have no place to hold our bags of household trash, that I leave your broken carcass in front of my house for any passerby to see.

Rest in Pieces.

second verse, same as the first...

So, uh, we didn't end up signing him up for football. Apparently he's not acclimating as well to jr. high as we had previously thought. He still needs more time to figure things out (like turning in his assignments).

While it feels like I'm punishing him, I explained that I can't in good conscience sign him up for something that would take up a good chunk of his spare time and energy when he's still struggling with what he already has on his plate.

(big sigh...)

Happy 7th Birthday, Zachary!

Seven things I love about Zach- (in no particular order)

1. He has my blue eyes.

2. His giggle.

3. His sense of humor.

4. How he loves his family. The way he plays with his brothers and sister, and always wants to be near them.

5. His inquisitive mind. He's always pouring over books and maps and taking in every little detail. History, geography, animals, space -he loves it all.

6. His imagination and creativity. He's always amazing me with the stuff he comes up with, and I love to hear all his little conversations with himself.

7. He has a mind like a steel trap. He memorizes everything, and we have all learned not to argue with him. Because he's generally right. He amazes us daily.

Happy Birthday, Zach! I love you!

Who woulda thunk?

Nick came home yesterday and announced he wanted to sign up for the flag football team at his jr. high. (It's a non-cut sport, meaning anyone who wants to play can.)

I didn't even know he had the slightest interest in football.

I'm proud of him for going out of his comfort zone. I hope he has a lot of fun.

What I'm not thrilled about is the 6 am practices. John can take him when he's in town, but when he's not I will have to get my sorry tail out of bed extra early, leave all my other kids sleeping in theirs, to get him to practice on time.

Wish both of us luck.

change + me = meltdown

~~sorry another very long, and very pictureless post~~

I'm not a big fan of change. Anything new or different is weird.

4 1/2 years ago when John bought me a new car, I didn't drive it for a week. It was just so big. I was sure I'd hit the first car parked on the side of the road. Finally a lack of food sent me to the grocery store.

5 1/2 years ago when we moved here, it was very emotionally difficult and I fought against it despite the fact I was getting a bigger house with room for all the kids and their stuff, a bigger kitchen, a bigger pantry, and about 10 times the storage space. I fought. I argued. I cried. In my heart I knew it was a good decision, (and it totally was) but I was still dragged here kicking and screaming.

Computers are no different.

Growing up, I had WordPerfect 5.0. I liked it. I figured it out on my own. In high school I took a computer class and was forced to learn WordPerfect 5.1. I mumbled and grumbled, but eventually got the hang of it. And then it was comfortable to me. I had all the F keys memorized. None of these newfangled fancy tool bars that you click with a crazy contraption called a mouse for me, no sirree.

My dad sent me to college with an old computer. I was very grateful. I think it was a 486 (which he upgraded just for me from a 286) or something with a whopping 40 megs of RAM. Or ROM. Or I don't know. Or maybe it was 40k? (Sorry about all this technical crap) Anyways, the school used Microsoft Word, and after much wailing and gnashing of teeth, I conceded I needed to change my word document program on my computer.

Fortunately for me I worked at Media Play at the time and had made friends with most of the geeks there. Bob was awesome. He was an older guy who used to work for the government and while looking at a Coke display, he'd say things like "Coke has done a real snow job on polar bears. They're not all cute and cuddly. Polar bears are mean creatures. They'd just as soon as eat you as look at you. Don't ask me how I know. If I told you, I'd have to kill you. Something to do with the Russians." And then he'd walk away, leaving you totally stunned, but absolutely sure he meant every last word of it. Bob hated most of the other cashiers. He thought they were stupid and had no patience for stupid. He liked me though. He reminded me a lot of my dad.

Anyway he tried installing Word on my computer, but the program was bigger than the memory I had, and he had to strip Word down to nothing so that I could use it.

After hearing about my pathetic computer, my other favorite geek, John- I think I've mentioned him once or twice?- came to my rescue and procured for me a hard drive with a whole gig of space on it. I thought that was overkill. When was I ever, EVER in my lifetime going to need something, anything, with a GIGABYTE of space on it?!?!

So, long story short, half my family was home sick yesterday from church. When I got back, Nick was absolutely shaking with excitement. "Have you checked your e-mail yet?" In my absence, he and John had once again upgraded my e-mail system, and Microsoft Word. I'm now forced to use 2007 instead of whatever archaic system I was clinging to. Grrrr.

"Be nice to me, I gave blood today"

So I gave blood for the first time ever today. I couldn't hide forever. In years past whenever a sign up sheet would pass by me at church or wherever for a blood drive, I would be either pregnant, or nursing, or really busy that day. "Next time", I'd tell myself.

The last time the opportunity came by I took the clipboard with the sign-up sheet, thumbed through the available time slots, told myself some (probably lame) excuse, and then passed it on.
John didn't.

A few weeks later I got a phone call from someone wanting to thank John for "saving three lives". John wasn't home (probably out of town) and so the guy was happy to have me pass on his thanks. He was a really nice guy, and I could see this call ending very badly.

He gave me statistics about how many donors never return a second time. (my guess it was the sharpened PVC piping they used to draw the blood. Holy cow, I could stick my finger down the middle of that needle- it was no surprise it took awhile to stop bleeding. ) He was hoping to make a return appointment for John- I told him we'd be out of town and John is ALWAYS out of town, but he assured me we could change the appointment at any time.

And then came the question- (see, I told you it was going to end badly) "Have YOU ever donated blood, Mrs. Berrett?"

I couldn't think of a good enough excuse. With a defeated sigh, I made an appointment. John and I were both scheduled for this morning. John got out of it though, he had a root canal last week and is still on anti-biotics (why didn't I think of that!?!)

So needless to say, I didn't back out. I manned up and went. I mean, I have given birth to four kids already. This couldn't be worse than that. (It wasn't.) I didn't feel very good afterwards, but it could be the #2 combo meal with fries and a chocolate shake I had at In-N-Out that I totally scarfed down in 8 seconds flat. - They said my next meal should be a big one, and I took them seriously. I also thought the red meat might be helpful in replenishing my blood supply. That and I am a firm believer in self-medicating. Food is usually my drug of choice. And I had an owie. I needed chocolate.

side note- Apparently I have awesome veins. I've been told many times. If I so choose, I could have a long and illustrious career as a heroin addict. That's supposing I don't die of a drug overdose of course.

things that made me laugh

At my grandma's house. Good thing she parks on the other side of the garage.
~~~
Welcome to Ogden, Utah. I think my favorite part is the orange sweatband.
~~~
This is one time when I'm glad my dad doesn't read my blog. I don't think he knew I took the picture. While pulling out of our campsite, those two big rocks formed a fantastic ramp and we were high centered before we knew what hit us. It took about an hour and some clever engineering, but he got out it out of there. Fortunately nothing was hurt, "but his pride". So, thanks in advance for not mentioning this little incident to my dad or the fact that I posted a picture of it on the Internet. Ü

School Days

School started this week for my kiddos. Christopher is naturally devastated. His three favorite playmates leave him every morning and he hates to be left behind.Before we could get to this week it was hours of shopping for clothes, shoes, backpacks, and a small fortune in school supplies. Also 2 haircuts (Zach still needs his) and 2 back to school nights to meet all the teachers.
Zach and Maddie love their teachers already, and it looks like a good year is shaping up for them. I don't have any experience with Maddie's teacher, Miss Rogers, but we've heard lots of good things about her. We're excited to have Mrs. Wood as Zach's teacher, besides being Madison's former very awesome 2nd grade teacher she is a friend, neighbor, and fellow church member.
Besides being totally overwhelmed, exhausted, and stressed about jr. high, we are cautiously optimistic that it will be a good year for him. We were worried that Nick's ALP teacher, Professor Umbridge, had managed to keep Nick out of his honor's classes, (she refused to sign the paper) but luckily that wasn't the case. From what I could ascertain at back to school night, his teachers seem pretty great. So far our favorite was his math teacher- his room was filled with Star Wars posters, and he even had a life size cardboard cut out of a storm trooper standing in the corner wearing an ASU t-shirt. Also I overheard his English teacher telling another student she accepts bribes. (I think she was joking. ) I hope she really likes caramels.

A couple of retarded dogs

Between John's only sister, and one of my brothers, I have exactly 2 nieces and 3 nephews. I wouldn't mind a few more though. They are each done having kids, and odds are my two other child-less brothers intend to stay that way, for the time being anyway. Such is life.

As I sat watching my middle brother, Tom, play with his dogs at the park, I posed the question- "Is this as good as I'm gonna get to you making me an Aunt again?"

His reply was "What? A couple of retarded dogs?"

Before any dog lovers out there get upset, I have to point out that they are retarded dogs. Like as in have real neurological issues. Tom and his girlfriend rescued them from the pound and have adopted Jerry, and are currently fostering Frankenstein (but hope to adopt him soon as well).

Jerry is totally deaf, and has other neurological issues. His head bounces around like he can't keep it still (but Tom reports he's tons better). He's the sweetest dog who never barks or misbehaves. My kids are in love with him.

My kids are also in love with Frankenstein or Frankie as they call him. He is in a little doggy wheelchair. Apparently the shelter was going to put him down, but he had too much personality and they just couldn't. We think he has cerebral palsy or something. He's just a puppy- only 10 months, and full of that puppy spirit and just wants to run and play but his legs won't work right. It's like the saddest/funniest thing when Tom lets him out of his wheelchair to give him some exercise and he tries to run and play but falls all over the place. My mom made the comment that at least they have Tom- any one else might have put them down. It's clear they adore him too and will do anything for his attention or to just be by his side.

So that's my official count right now- I'm an Aunt to 2 nieces, 3 nephews and a couple of retarded dogs.

Christopher - spea(click!)

I love it when kids start talking and they develop their own little language. Christopher is, of course, no exception. Some of my favorites are-

sambo- sandwich

chawdee- chocolate

pahsuhsee- popcicle

ookie- cookie

slasses- glasses

cyto- motorcycle, bike, scooter

icky- special blankie

And then there are my favories- he has a hard time with the ending sounds of some words (like ck and g) so he makes that clicking noise with his tongue on the roof of his mouth.

Nick becomes Ni(click!)

truck becomes tru(click!)

clock becomes clo(click!)

flag becomes fla(click!)

pig becomes pi(click!)

I DO NOT correct him, and I tell people not to either. They learn on their own. My very favorite beanerina went to bed one night, and the next morning in her place was a pretty little ballerina and I nearly cried.

Speaking of milestones...

That last post happened to be my 400th.

I just randomly happened to notice that.

Crazy, eh?

That's not bad for someone who never thought this blog would see 40.

Who knew I had so much to talk about?

Milestone

Some milestones are good.

First day of kindergarten...

Sweet 16...

First wedding anniversary...

Baby's first steps...

Some are not so good.

My car hit the 100 thousand mile mark the other day. It's officially old.

And just as John predicted, that's when it started to fall apart on us.

First, the day we left for Utah, we went out to pack the car and discovered the battery was dead. That cost more than you would think. $$

Then, after I'd been in Utah only a week, the battery died again. My air conditioning was on the fritz and refused to turn off. (Thereby draining the brand-spanking-new battery.) Seriously the fan would run for hours even after the key was out of the ignition and everything was turned off. $$$$

On the way home from Utah, we heard some funny noises while on the freeway, got out, looked at the car for a flat (all we really knew to do) then drove on and put that incident out of our minds. Later, we pulled into a gas station that shared space with a mechanics shop and a mechanic happened to walk by, stop dead in his tracks, stare at our tires and make faces of the incredulous variety. Apparently our shocks blew. I know it sounds like some sort of scam, and I have no doubt he was trolling around looking for customers, but he showed the shocks to John, (while still on the car) and even John with his untrained eye could see they need to be replaced now. The guy seemed nice and just desperate for work, and showed us his parts cost, and gave us a deal on his time, but still...$$$$$$$$$

Unfortunately we got the car used and still have a good six months of car payments. I was hoping to keep the car for a couple of years after that point to enjoy not having a car payment, but if I have many more months of paying more than twice my car payment in car repairs, a new(er) car (and consequently 5 more years of paying that car off) sounds better all the time.

Camping with Grandpa

Every summer that we are in Utah, we try and make a point of doing a little car camping with my dad. The Great Outdoors are his passion in life, and while "car camping" is a little tame for his tastes, he loves to share that kind of stuff with his grand kids. (and we love it too)My mom, John, and Christopher joined us for the oh-so-exciting roasting of the weenies and marshmallows over the fire for dinner, but then left us to go and sleep in their beds. (John wasn't feeling well, Christopher would have been a nightmare for the rest of us, and camping is not on the list of what grandma calls "fun".)We just went up the canyon and stayed in a campground at the Alta ski resort. The kids had a lot of fun. They played around, satisfied their inner pyros, found some snow to play in, went on hikes, and got the tar scared out of them when the storm hit. (it was all wind, and very little rain, but 2 out of 3 kids were in tears- the only near casualties were the tents we neglected to stake down)
Despite the fact that each year I understand more and more why people camp with motor homes instead of tents, (boy was that a miserable night for me) I look forward to our yearly camp out with my dad. I mentioned to my dad that maybe next year Nick might be big enough to go on one of my dad's big week long backpacking/river rafting/slot canyon trips. Those are way too much fun for me though.