For me, the overall jr. high experience was an exercise in conformity, of fitting in. More than anything I wanted to fit in, but not just that, I desperately wanted to not be noticed. At all. I think I worried if any attention came my way it would be for negative reasons- I wasn't skinny enough, my hair wasn't cute enough, my clothes didn't have any name brands, etc. I even remember being afraid to laugh. I mastered the art of the silent laugh because I was afraid people would notice me if I laughed out loud. (which ironically drew more attention- cause it was weird.)
Enter Jamie.
I remember the first day I noticed her- I was in 8th and she was in 7th, and we were heading the same direction in the hallway- towards PE. She had one of those large bags that was popular at the time, (mine was a dark blue-nothing too flashy, but with the required Esprit logo on the front), except hers had a large (10 inches?) clock attached to the front of it (so she'd never be late- or so she said) and instead of carrying it over her shoulder with the rest of the populace, she dragged it. She had long, blonde hair, she flirted with boys, and she was loud and funny and liked to sing alot. (she has an amazing voice.)
Another day we were in a creative writing class together and she was sitting in her chair, upside down with her head near the ground, because "the extra blood in her brain helps her think better".
Attention seeking? Yes. But in my eyes -Oh So Brave. I admired her. Wanted to be like her. We became the best of friends. Sorta yin & yang-ish.
I liked being around her because she demanded attention everywhere she went, which left me in my favorite spot- the wallflower. Except she didn't always let me claim that spot. She'd introduce me to boys and make me talk to them.
But it was more than that. Her home became a second home to me. She was the sister I never had. She was the kind of friend who was never afraid to tell you if your butt looked big in something. When one of us was had our heart broken, the other one would always be willing to buy the biggest bag of candy and stay in and watch sappy movies and cry with each other.
She was the kind of friend that later in life, after you were bridesmaids for each other, you could ask her to video tape the birth of your first born (which I did) because you knew she wouldn't tape anything too embarrassing. (and she did an excellent job, in my opinion.- I could totally post it on the internet if I didn't think it would bore the snot out of everyone.)
It wasn't always smooth sailing, but the good has ALWAYS outweighed the bad. I figured it out the other day and we have been friends for 20 years. Two whole decades. (okay, to be fair, it's only been 19 years, it took me a whole year to have the courage to put myself out there and be able to claim her as a friend.)
So it was quite humorous (and a little flashback inducing) to me as I called home to my mom the other night to find out what my curfew was. (mom was watching my kids). Jamie and I wanted to stay up late and eat and watch movies and talk and laugh like time hasn't passed, with the minor exception being instead of eating a sickening amount of junk food, we snacked on cherries and pistachios. (only I totally cracked a tooth on one of the pistachios and now I'm thinking maybe we shoulda stuck with the chocolate and gummy bears.)
This is the only picture I have of her with me. Jamie, Madison and I went on a girls shopping trip to one of my favorite places- Gardner Village. I think my kids have finally learned her name- they've only known her as my "funny friend" for awhile now.
