In a nutshell those two blog posts were about the very same coach to a bunch of boys playing flag football. One was from the perspective of the wife of one of the coaches, the other from the mother of one of the kids on the team. Their team ended up winning the championship against numerous odds, but the point of the story was that the coach placed the individual team members above winning. ( and who knew that when you treat kids like winners, in the end they up taking home the big trophy)
What got me thinking was about Nick's not-so-glorious career as a soccer player. He played for like 5 years. We were on numerous teams. Sometimes the coaches were pretty great, and sometimes not so. The coaches we liked best were the ones who did value the players over winning, but sadly our story is a little different than the flag football story. Most of the time the teams we were on lost repeatedly. The soccer league we were in was a just-for-fun league and never kept score. There were no championship games. But we still knew. The kids still knew when they lost yet another game. 
But Nick still managed to keep a good attitude the whole time. He said he loved soccer, and every time we asked, he said he wanted to sign up again. Truth be told, he was (sorry Nick) at the bottom end of the talent spectrum when it came to soccer. I still admired his attitude and his desire to go on. I never once got to be the proud mom and watch her son score a goal in all those games, but I got to be the proud mom to watch her kid run to the injured player and help him off the field, no matter what team the kid was on, and even though the rules stated he should have been kneeling on the field.
Then there was the very last soccer season. Nick was finally bumped up in age bracket and had to be on an all boys team. The league was still non-competitive, but to watch that coach, you'd think otherwise. He immediately divided the team into two parts- the starters, and the other kids. (Guess which part we were in) The starters played for most of the games, and the other kids, while technically getting to play in every game, only got a few minutes play time. I truthfully couldn't tell you whether it was a winning season or not. I had heard rumor that he was handpicking his own winning team, and trying to force out "the losers". Maybe it was just a rumor.
Then came the after season party. This is usually a fun time for all involved, and the coach started out handing out the participation trophies (and I realize that this whole subject is debatable, that giving kids trophies just for showing up can be perceived as a dangerous practice, and I'm not really gonna go into the pros and cons here) But then he started handing out the "real" awards. He gave a certificate 'most improved', 'most goals scored', etc. Everybody got something, except Nick and this other little boy. Nick was crying before the party was over. He was off in a corner so that no one would see him, but it was evident that the coach made him feel bad about himself. He (and we as parents) tried to ignore it the whole season long, but it became glaringly obvious that because Nick wasn't as good as the other kids he wasn't needed or wanted on the team. At nine years old his career as a soccer player was over.
I'm not saying that if he had had a different coach it would have made all the difference and he might be playing for a professional team some day, cause it's been fairly evident from day one that the kid doesn't have an ounce of competition in his blood, but I would have like to see him enjoying playing the sport as long as he wanted to, even though clearly, soccer isn't where his talent lies. I am also sorry that it had to end on such a sour note.
On a positive note, apparently public speaking is one of his natural born talents. (Don't ask me where he gets this from) It was the primary program in church today and Nick was one of the narrators. He spoke loudly and clearly and with animation to his voice. By the end of the day he said he was getting kind of embarrassed at the number of adults who were telling him what a great job he did. I overheard one lady as she was singing his praises to him and he was trying to downplay it and say that he was just one of the many who did a great job and there were lots of others who worked hard and did a good job too. Truth be told I had a few people tell me I need to put him in acting classes. Which I will. If he wants to. Just as soon as he masters the talent of turning in his assignments on time and brings those grades up.
