boys vs girls

For valentine's day my two middle kids needed to decorate boxes to collect their valentines in at school.

Madison pestered me for a week. "pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease..."

Zach mentioned it in passing. "oh, yeah, I need a box."

Upon examination of the three (free) shoe boxes I managed to scrounge up, Madison turned her nose up at them and begged me to take her to Michaels to find something cuter. "Please! I'll do extra chores! I'll pay for everything!"

Zach looked at the shoe boxes and said "I can have whichever box I want? wow. thanks!"

After settling on a set of hat boxes and a package of heart stickers, Madison came up with the idea that she could turn them into a birthday cake because it also happens to be Arizona's birthday on Valentine's Day.

I showed Zach a cute idea I found on another blog- sixtypiggies where you turn your box into a valentine eating monster. "Nah." I offered construction paper to decorate it. "No thanks." Stickers? "eh." He opted for the no-frills white paint with red lettering.

And at the end of the day, everybody was happy.

Is that your natural color?

I asked John not to get me flowers this year.

In theory, I love Valentines day, but in reality the whole holiday makes my eyebrow twitch.

Nothing says "I love you" more than an oversized teddybear, a giant box of cheap chocolates, a cheesy card, and overpriced flowers you bought all at the last minute at the corner drug store or the giant tent outside the grocery store.

Don't get me wrong, I love it when John brings home flowers. A simple bouquet of daisies he thought would brighten my day, or a pretty bunch of tulips to let me know he was thinking of me. I can live with that.

But paying extortionist prices for roses because the calendar tells you to? No really, I'm not having one of those "me thinks the lady doth protest too much" moments. Please. Just save your money.

That being said, John and I were at Costco yesterday and walked passed the flower display, and I let him talk me into a bunch of daisies. His arguments were these-

-"they're pretty"

-"Madison will love them too, you can share them with her"

-"I need to set an example for her of what kind of husband to find"

- "I also need to set an example for the boys of what kind of husband to be"

-"they're less than $10"

Well, they did brighten up the kitchen, Madison squealed with delight, and hopefully the kids took notes. And an hour or so later, they also made me laugh. I thought they were an unusually bright color.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Dear John-

Thank you for the roses. They're beautiful.

I still think you're silly for sending me flowers when the cost of flowers is so ridiculously expensive. If you have to be away next year and want to send me a little something to let me know you are thinking of me and love me, I'm thinking a maid would be nice.

I do appreciate how you set the bar so high for the kids. I hope they are paying attention so that when they are older the boys want to be the kind of husband they see in you, and Madison will want to marry a guy just like her dad.

Sorry I forgot to wish you a Happy Valentine's Day yesterday. I forgot that the dates are all messed up too. I remember to subtract 8 hours and then add tomorrow, and that's how I figure out what time and what day of the week you are in, but I forgot about the date change too.

Love you, and miss you

Kirsten

Valentine's highlights

So yesterday wasn't all bad. It had it's high points. - For starters I woke up to John making breakfast which included pink heart shaped pancakes. John was a brat and although we had decided "no presents" because the trip to Europe was our present to each other for the next decade of events which require some kind of present, he still got me a gift card to Barnes and Noble. I feel like a schmuck.

I got to go to the baby shower for a friend of mine who just had twin baby girls.- Simone and Lola. How cute are those names? The girls were 8 weeks early, and the last one just came home the night before last. It was hard to leave that party, that celebration of life, full of hope and joy and promise, and head to the funeral. John was upset I was fifteen minutes late getting home. But we got there on time. I knew all I had to do was throw on a black dress.

Instead of going out for dinner, I think both John and I were happy to be home surrounded by our kids, and Christopher was cranky, so John went and got take-out and I ate an In-n-Out burger and chocolate shake for dinner. MMMMM....Chocolate.... Good thing I already sabotaged myself with those stupid m&m's.

Believe it or not, there was also a ward party- it was billed as a "pre-date" party, but anyone who showed up didn't have any better plans (including us), and so it was actually the main event. It was pretty cheesy. But it worked. It was fun. The best part was their version of the "newlywed game" which John and I would have totally rocked at if we had gotten some of the questions the other rounds got. My favorite- "On a scale of one to ten, how romantic is your wife?" While ALL of the other couples said "ten", John and I looked at each other in the audience and said "three." It's true. John is more romantic than I am. We got questions like "describe your wife's personality in one word" and one that we should have gotten right was the question "would your husband rather be richer than Bill Gates or smarter than Einstein?" I, of course, picked the correct answer which was richer than Bill Gates, because while yes, I am happy that my husband is of a higher intellect, I really don't care if he's that smart. My dad works with real, actual rocket scientists. Brilliant PhD holding guys. Who in my dad's words "Couldn't find their way out of a wet paper bag with a flashlight and a map". John is already smart enough for me. I realize that a lot of money in the hands of an idiot is a dangerous thing, but we're not talking about an idiot here. So I'm right, he's wrong. Richer than Bill Gates is the correct answer.

So you know, the day had it's bright spots. I've had better though- like last year. I tried to convince John we needed to go back to NYC again this year, but it isn't going to happen. I could have really done without that funeral though...

Funerals, death, and other fun topics

It's days like today that make me extra grateful for my faith and my beliefs that families are forever and that we will be reunited with those we love some day. I don't know how some people function without that knowledge. That being said- Funerals for two year olds should still be against the law. Not Allowed.

The youngest son of a friend and co-worker of John's died in an accident in his home this last week. He was two years, one month, and one day old- according to his father during his comments at the funeral.

The little coffin was heartbreaking. I couldn't look at it. THOSE definitely should be against the law. At least we sat in the back far corner and I had my sunglasses and I could divert my eyes and stare at the band when those people carrying that little itty-bitty coffin walked by.

Yeah, I said band. I'm not sure, but I am guessing that some churches have organs and pianos, and some have choirs, and this one had a band in the corner. Complete with drums and electric guitar. Very Christian Rockish. It reminded me of those infomercials I see on TV. I was grateful to have something to divert my attention. It seemed so out of place there. It was so odd to me. The band helped keep the tears in check until we walked out of the church to see them handing out yellow Spongebob balloons to all the mourners to release into the air, and the sight of those balloons made me lose it. I was really regretting leaving the tissues at home now.

I've already told the kids that when I die I just want a small graveside service, the cheapest casket they can get their hands on, and that's it. No fuss. No tears. Or, I don't think I'd object to having a band at my funeral. Maybe a cover band or something. Like the Beatles. Or a local garage band who wouldn't mind covering some of my favorite songs. I also wouldn't object to an Elvis impersonator either. It would be hard to cry with the absurdity of it all.

In related news, as we were making the hour long trek across the valley today, John mentioned that my mother had called this morning, and she had made a comment about not liking Valentines day. He had assumed it had something to do with the fact that my father doesn't have a romantic bone in his body (which he doesn't), but the truth of the matter is that it has a whole lot to do with the fact that today is the 23rd anniversary of her father's death. He died on Valentine's day 1986. I remember that date because a) it was a holiday, and b) I remember my mom having a bad feeling about 1986. She was dreading it and didn't know why. She kept trying to write 1987 on all her checks (this was before debit cards- or at least before she had one)

He died of cancer, and it was very quick and very painful. She was able to fly out to see him and say goodbye, but wasn't able to go to back for the funeral. It was a very dark day in my mother's life. John wanted to know if she was ever able to go back later, and I told him that there was nothing for her there to go back to. Not even a gravestone. My grandpa was cremated and had his golfing buddies scatter his remains at every hole of his favorite golf course. It was fitting.

So, um, yeah, I've had better Valentine's Days. I've lodged a formal complaint. But I'm going to go hug my own two year old now. Because I can.

3 days

3 days is all I made it before I mindlessly popped a handful of m & m's into my mouth that one of the kids had left on the kitchen table. Wasn't I just saying "If I am going to fail, it's going to be for something better than a handful of some colorful, slightly mediciney flavored candy" ? Aaarrgh!

Okay, okay, three days is easy enough to beat. I can do this. The question is though- when do I officially "start"? After Valentine's day just in case some irresistible chocolate comes my way, or after my first box of thin mints? Decisions, decisions.

PS -I had considered starting Weight Watchers again yesterday because it's about time, my high school reunion is this summer, I would really like to fit into shorts this summer, I now have a babysitting network to drop Christopher off at so I don't have to take him with me anymore, (Christopher is my official excuse for failure last year-he was a nightmare to take, so I quit) etc, etc. But several things came up. For starters, Madison hurt her foot at gymnastics -we were worried it was broken, but haven't taken her to the doctor because she seems to be able to hobble around well enough, so I had to stay home with her. Also John called and he was supposed to be taking some clients out to lunch, but they had to cancel, so he was in need of some "clients" to take to lunch. So now the question comes back- do I start WW after Valentines day, or after a box (or two) of thin mints?

Valentine's Day!

Okay, I know this is a week late, but I've been busy. That and I don't know how to upload (or is it download?) pictures from my camera to my computer because I am severely handicapped by my marriage to a computer guru. However for the sake of jounaling or whatever you want to call it, I thought I would just mention a bit about this particular holiday in our house. It's not a big one for us, and wasn't terribly important in my family growing up, nor I suspect in John's, but over the years it has grown ever so slightly year by year to something I think the kids look forward to. This year was celebrated wtih a heart shaped pizza and a giant heart shaped Rice Krispy treat (with sprinkles!) - that dessert was new this year. In year's past we've had pink heart shaped pancakes with some sort of berry syrup and/or berries. One year I bought champagne flutes with pink and red hearts on them and the kids insist on using them every year since. We used to drink Schweppes Raspberry Gingerale until a couple years ago when the stores stopped carrying it. (the jerks. One of these days I might get around to writing a letter. ) We made due with cherry limeade this year. Good, but just not the same. I generally try and get the kids a little present like a book or something. This year all they got was a Hershey's valentine chocolate bar. We decided that they'd be getting enough presents in the next few days anyway. Sometimes I try and make sugar cookies, but I had too much on my plate already this year. John and I left the next day for a little weekender to NYC, and I had to clean, pack, help kids with school projects, etc., etc., etc. more on that trip in posts to come.- instead of trying to summarize a whole week into one post I thought I'd break it up into topics, then I could do it at my leisure without feeling like I was writing a novel.