I'm better now.

"better" being a relative term of course.

John let me take a three hour nap this afternoon.

And then for FHE we had a nice discussion on how we can ALL make our home a happier one. And discussed ways to revamp the current system of chores and responsibilities around here.

And why I don't feel like making cookies or dinner for or playing games with or being in the general vicinity of children who leave me messes like this to clean up.

(Granted these pictures were taken last February, this is what I returned home to find one evening, and while this is an extreme example, scenes like this are a little more common than they should be. And fyi I made my kids stay up way past the their bedtimes on a school night until it was all cleaned up )

I am totally open to ANY thoughts, ideas, or suggestions on what works for you, has worked for you at any period, worked for your mother, friend, neighbor, etc.

A wanted man

Some how we've been blessed in this economy in that John has pretty good job security. He's got the training, the know-how, the experience...

Also fortunately his company is pretty fiscally sound. It's privately owned by a pretty smart guy (so I hear). So, even if in the crazy off chance that the Earth would open up and swallows his company whole, he's still got plenty of options. Assuming it wasn't one of the few days he was actually in his office. (He actually has a cubicle of his own. It's in St. Louis. He checks on it every so often. Changes the calendar on the wall. That sort of thing.)

In fact, it seems that every where he goes, he's being offered a job of some sort.

Of course we never really consider them. One of the latest was in Washington DC. I know, we are crazy, but John turned down a job to make less money where we would have to live at least an hour or more away just to be able to afford a decent house. (But not comparable to what we live in- that's an expensive town) And pay piles of money to put our kids in private schools so they could have the same standard of education they have here. For free.

And then we've even turned down offers for exponentially more money.

500k + 500k more if he finishes the job.

In other words a million dollars.

Which will take about 18 months.

In Afghanistan. You know, a war zone.

"You're turning down a million dollars!! Are you crazy?!?!" - I've heard that more than once.

It's not so much the money, which is slightly tempting- pay off the house and the car and take the kids on an extended vacation, then chuck the rest into retirement. (not that I've given it much thought)

It's that one little word that gets me- if.

If what?

If he lives? If he doesn't get blown up? If he doesn't run home screaming 6 months into the job?

And why is the salary so high anyway? Because other wives saw the footage of the American contractor several years ago get kidnapped by terrorists, and then get his head chopped off when the government wouldn't meet their demands? I'm fairly certain that image would haunt my nightmares every night for 18 months. Are all the dollar signs supposed to distract me from that?

And 18 months is a long time. Birthdays, Holidays, our 15th anniversary...

Would we even be the same people 18 months from now? I hear all sorts of stories of soldiers coming home completely different people. I realize he wouldn't be fighting, but still.

And the kids- They'd be way different.

What would we be gambling for that money? John's life? Our Marriage?

And I mean no disrespect to those who do serve over there. Who leave behind families of their own. Proudly, for a heck of a lot less money. They have my undying gratitude.

And then there's his latest trip. While in Belgium, one of the guys he would work with, was acting as John's own personal employment agency. Constantly showing him job opportunities.

John finally ended the conversation with- Tell you what- you find me a temporary job for say 2-3 months, during the summer, I'll bring my whole family over, and we'll check it out. See if it's something we want to think about.

The other guy promised to get right on that.

And just FYI- we know this is where we belong. In this house. In this ward. In this state. To really contemplate anything else, just feels so wrong. But this, this is right.

Number One

John is #1 in his company in terms of traveling. The guy in the #2 spot didn't even come close.

He went on 49 trips this year

Gone a total of 249 days

69 different cities

7 different countries

231,453 miles traveled.

His boss is making him the poster boy for too much traveling.

Caramels, caramels, and more caramels

That is my life right now. I should be making more, but I ran out of pecans and Costco doesn't open for like 10 more hours.

I started to think this was the year that nobody was going to buy any, or like a fraction of last year, but the orders are still rolling in. I am having a hard time keeping my head above water. So to all you people whom I am related to (by marriage- those I am related to by blood can make your own) I probably won't expect to get a package in the mail until after Christmas. Sorry. The plan was to get yours out first, (cause so many of you never got your package last year) but then, well, life happened.

Life-

I turned 35. Madison turned 11. On the same day. I still need to write about that. It was a good birthday, and a nice break from the stove. I only made one batch that day.

Nick passed math!!!! 63.3% !!!! I've never been so happy to see a D on a report card in my life. Which is actually ridiculously unacceptable for such a bright kid, but we'll take it. He failed both semesters last year. He was hovering at about 60% for most of the semester, but he did really well on his final, so yay!

Speaking of Nick, I am probably crossing a line here, (which probably won't be the first time) but Nick finally figured out the name of the girl he has a crush on. She's in his EVYS with him. He's liked her for over a year. But until recently didn't know her name and was too embarrassed to ask. She's cute. I've seen her. I actually watched her chew him out for forgetting to dress up the day they had pictures and dress rehearsal. "I reminded you!" "You did not!" "Yes I did!" "No you didn't." "Yes I did." "Okay you did." I have three thoughts on the matter- firstly that is the kind of girl he needs. Someone who will keep him in line. Secondly, I'm happy to see he has already learned that the girl is always right. They playfully argued back and forth, but he eventually conceded. And lastly, I am not too worried. I was late picking him up once and he said "That's okay, her mom is always late and I got to hang out and talk with her". "Oh,would you like me to be late more often?" "No, that's okay, I'd rather go home and eat." I think I will really start to worry when food takes a back seat to a girl.

John is home FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR. And get this- he had his annual review with his boss today, and got nearly perfect scores on everything except his work habits. It's not what you think- his boss actually told him he works too much and needs to balance his family life and work life a little better. Well duh! Then later in the day someone else was trying to convince him to spend 5 straight weeks in Europe. In February. They compromised. He'll be gone three.

That's about it. My brain is mush. It's after midnight and there are three batches of caramels I should probably cut and wrap before I go to bed tonight. I do really like giving them away. It's nice to be able to do something and give people something that they love so much. Warm fuzzies and all that. John took some to a work party and made this lady that helps him out with stuff cry today. "Thank you! you made my day! I've been looking forward to these all year!" And the extra money is always nice. I just wish I could figure out some way to spread it out over the rest of the year. I'd say "Christmas in July" and tell everyone they'll get their caramels then, but the last thing I'll want to do in July in Arizona is slave over a hot stove all day.

Veteran's Day

As luck would have it, John happens to be in Washington DC today. He's doing some work for the government, so naturally he has the day off.

He texted me these pictures a little while ago, and I thought I would share them with you.

This first picture is at the ceremony for the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. John was able to attend (he was practically the last one in) and was able to see and hear VP Biden speak. (something the President usually does)

Arlington National Cemetery

John F. Kennedy and Jackie's grave site

Lincoln Memorial

Part of the World War II memorial with the Washington Monument in the background.

I'm not exactly sure what I'm looking at here. I'll have to have John tell me later, unless anyone wants to chime in on the comments. It's pretty, though.

Washington Monument

On a side note, when John got off the subway at Arlington National Cemetery he told me there were a few protesters there. I thought it pretty ironic that they were protesting outside a cemetery where countless soldiers are buried who died defending their right to protest. It was heartening to hear however that there were 10 times the amount of people counter-protesting the protesters. In other words, more people were there to show support and give thanks, rather than be angry and ugly and hate-filled.

And lastly- to all the Vets in my life- a big thank you for serving!

you know your husband travels too much when...

John's birthday is in a couple of weeks.

He just got a birthday card in the mail.

From Southwest Airlines.

Seriously.

I guess it is fitting since last year he spent more money on airplane tickets than we did on our mortgage.

Again, Seriously.

John is in Italy.

It's his fourth trip to Europe (third without me) and this time he is visiting Germany, Italy, and Belgium.

Germany and Belgium he's been before, but never Italy.

He's in love.

(with the country, of course!)

He used to be all about Germany. Studied German in high school, thinks red cabbage sauerkraut is the finest thing to ever be fermented, etc, etc, and it was a life long dream to visit there. (That dream was realized two years ago.)

We've fantasized about moving there. For a year or two anyway. Not permanently. We were even teaching our kids German as part of FHE for a few weeks.

Italy was never even really thought about (as a place to live). England- absolutely. Belgium- why not? But Italy?

But in just 2 short days, he's hooked.

He actually said he'd rather move to Northern Italy than Germany right now.

He sends me pictures via text message every so often.

With comments like "wish you were here!"

and "our table, waiting for you"

and "the best pasta I have ever had!"

My texts back to him vary between feeling incredibly jealous he's over there and I'm stuck here dealing with kids and their messes and their fighting and arguing and whining, and trying to clean the house and pack and plan so I can drive the kids to Utah by myself next week,

details about my bout with the flu or whatever that bug was that had me puking all night,

and the mundane like "did you pay the cable bill?"

Aaah, what a glamorous life I lead.

Before I garner too much sympathy, he's gonna make it up to me though. He has another business trip planned for next month which I do get to accompany him! Not to Italy though. Mostly Germany with a little bit of Austria and Belgium thrown in for fun. He will have to work most of the time, and I will be on my own, wandering about the German countryside, but I think I can handle that.

My real life Chuck

One of our favorite shows on TV is a cute show called "Chuck". It's about a computer geek turned government spy.

While the spy part doesn't really apply, the computer geek part definitely does. And occasionally he gets to do his part to serve his country.

John is being "deployed" tomorrow on a "mission" to serve his Country at a United States Military Base in Japan.

I was given a copy of his "papers". I guess in case something happens to him.

It actually says stuff like "Upon completion of the mission, the employee should make all attempts to return to the deployment processing center point of origin".

Pretty cool, eh?

He would be staying in the base housing except it's full. So he's staying in a hotel. He will however be attending the LDS church with the military.

He's kind of looking forward to it. He grew up in a family with parents who worked for the Air Force, and when he was a little boy it was a dream of his to join the Air Force when he grew up, because it's a stepping stone to NASA. He wanted to be an Astronaut.

It's only for two weeks, though.

Well, he'll be in Japan for three weeks, but his "mission" is only for two. The week after his "Deployed Performance Period" there's a big computer convention in Tokyo, and they figure as long as he's already over there...

My husband, saving the world one computer at a time.

you know your husband travels alot when...

You can't remember what state he's currently in, nor do you really care, because they all just seem to blend together. Ohio...Missouri...Texas...California... OhMisTexnia.

You get a better night's sleep when he's gone.

After a month of being a single car family, you're still excited with that plan.

Your oldest child makes the observation that his dad is gone so much it's like his parents are divorced.

Minus the ugly, painful, devastating part of actually getting the divorce of course. And I still get to be a stay at home mom.

On the plus side, John has traveled so much this year he's already earned me another "companion pass". Which means wherever he goes in the year 2010, I can go with him.

I just have to carefully, selectively choose when to use it (San Francisco, Seattle this year) because it's hard enough on the kids only having only one parent around, I don't need them feeling like orphans. (Besides, 95% of the places John goes, I have no desire to)

My first job

I hated the job itself, but whenever I am in town I always have to stop in for a Golden Burger, fries and fry sauce.

I was a cashier at a local hamburger place for a year. A whole stinking year. I think that was some kind of record. The pay was lousy, but at least my complexion was bad from all the grease. (and that is coming from a 33 year old who still has issues with zits.)

I thought about taking a picture of the burger that brings me back year after year, but they burnt it.

(Coincidentally - Misty, Charity, and Jamie all worked with me there at some point. They were smart though, and didn't last as long as me)

Why we're here.

I'm here for fun.
I'm here to see the sights.
I'm here because one of the perks of John flying so much is that they gave me a companion pass, meaning anywhere he can go, I can go for free. Given that I'm the mother of four, this was my first opportunity to use it.

John's here for work. He has a big geek conference he's attending, and I'm just along for the ride.

We came a couple days early to spend some time together, but he has to spend a majority of the time being where his work wants him to be, talking to other geeks, learning new stuff, etc.
I got to go to the opening night convention thingy last night. John was pretty excited to show me stuff so when he comes home and talks about stuff, I'll know what he's talking about. (Sorta.) Like the big Cisco machine he got his CCIE on. (Super-cool certification) I haven't felt that out of place in awhile.
A room full of geeks, talking geek stuff, and me.
I did a lot of smiling and nodding.

They had refreshments. "Conference food." It wasn't that great.

And drinks. The alcohol was plentiful,

but for us soda pop drinkers, the pickings were pretty slim. After an hour all that was left was Caffeine free Coke and Diet Orange Crush.

They even had super heroes.
And scantily clad "booth babes". I didn't take any pictures of the "booth babes." You're Welcome.

Where else can a bunch of computer geeks meet both people dressed like comic book heroes, and get beautiful, scantily clad women to talk to them and pose for pictures? You could almost picture some of these guys as pimply faced teenagers reading comic books and playing on their Atari's.

John was criticized by some of the guys for bringing me with him. How else was he supposed to have fun with me hanging around? Apparently my computer geek is one in a million. It's a rare thing to want to hang out with your wife.

Frequent Flyer

Just for fun, we started collecting postcards last May of all the different places John travels to- I got to thinking today that it's almost been a year since we started keeping track, and in almost one year's time he will have been to

32 different states (33 including AZ)

and

8 different foreign countries.

That's on average over 3 different places a month not counting repeats. (Some states he visits pretty frequently)

Dang. That's a lot. Good thing I'm fairly independent. (and I have a good security system!)

Berrett, John Berrett

John told me a friend came up to him yesterday and informed him that he "figured him out". John is actually like the dad from the Incredibles, he doesn't actually have some "boring job" that he tells people about, and he didn't actually need surgery for "bad knees" he actually got hurt fighting crime in Bucharest or something.

That got me thinking. I'm thinking his friend is on to something there, but I'm thinking more like 007, or Christian Slater in the TV show My Own Worst Enemy. He's really some kind of secret agent, and when he says "I've got a meeting in St. Louis", what he really means is he's going on some super secret spy mission to Bucharest.

It's all starting to make sense now...